Sometimes you find a book and know that eventually time will come and you will be able to immerse yourself in it. I knew about Well-Behaved Indian Women long before it came out but it was only when I was travelling in India, almost two years after publication date, that I thought of this book and gave it a read. A multigenerational drama about an Indian family, this book was relatable and a comfort to read. Check out the synopsis below:
Well-Behaved Indian Women
By Saumya Dave | Goodreads
From a compelling new voice in women’s fiction comes a mother-daughter story about three generations of women who struggle to define themselves as they pursue their dreams.
Simran Mehta has always felt harshly judged by her mother, Nandini, especially when it comes to her little “writing hobby.” But when a charismatic and highly respected journalist careens into Simran’s life, she begins to question not only her future as a psychologist, but her engagement to her high school sweetheart.
Nandini Mehta has strived to create an easy life for her children in America. From dealing with her husband’s demanding family to the casual racism of her patients, everything Nandini has endured has been for her children’s sake. It isn’t until an old colleague makes her a life-changing offer that Nandini realizes she’s spent so much time focusing on being the Perfect Indian Woman, she’s let herself slip away.
Mimi Kadakia failed her daughter, Nandini, in ways she’ll never be able to fix—or forget. But with her granddaughter, she has the chance to be supportive and offer help when it’s needed. As life begins to pull Nandini and Simran apart, Mimi is determined to be the bridge that keeps them connected, even as she carries her own secret burden.
Content notes include grief, emotional abuse, misogyny, domestic abuse, rape, and infidelity.
Well-Behaved Indian Women Review
Well-Behaved Indian women is a beautiful story about how mothers try to do better for their daughters, doing whatever is in their power to give them a life with more opportunities than they ever had. Mimi is the oldest of the three main characters in the book. She is now retired. She loves being around girls and teaching them, giving them access to education that they may be getting denied due to their socioeconomic status. Nandini, her daughter, moved to the US after her marriage and is a doctor there. Simran is Nandini’s daughter and Well-Behaved Indian Women is set in the time when Simran is just out of college. Her longtime boy-friend, Kunal, has proposed to her and what lies ahead is an Indian wedding preparation while trying to figure out who she is and how to make her dreams of being a writer come true.
I had a great time reading this book after celebrating my wedding. It takes a lot of work to host one, there are numerous decisions to make and details to think about. It was nice to not be caught up in the whirlwind of things to do and to see it from someone else’s perspective for a change. Simran may be born and raised in America, she has grown up in an Indian family, surrounded by her culture’s community while also being influenced by her birth country.
There are many interesting perspectives interwoven into this tale – that of Simran’s brother who spent more time in India with their grandmother than Simran ever did, that of her father and his professional aspirations and his expectations of his wife.
Simran’s narrative is that of a young woman who is just coming into her own but is faced with the challenge of meeting culture expectations because of her wedding. She often came off as childish and I questioned some of her lines of thinking and actions but at the same time, with her age, maybe it made sense to do what she did. I loved Simran’s relationship with Mimi and their bond made this a special book for me.
Nandini was the highlight of the book. She is an amazing woman and has seen a lot in life. Sadly, she has also been ashamed because of the things that happened to her. She carries her secret with deep shame. She has done everything demanded of herself as a wife and doctor. She is juggling a lot as the mother of the bride, an Indian female doctor and a wife. When a job opportunity presents itself, she is forced to ask herself if her life could be different. Nandini portrayed an important lesson in life: we are allowed to reinvent ourselves even if some people, our kids in particular, are not aware of the change we went through before they came.
As I grow older, I think about how my relationship has evolved with my parents. When I was in high school and my mom used to work out of town, I looked forward to her calls in the evening and catching her up with what had happened at school and work. As emotions became complex, love and friendships had bittersweet experiences, I wasn’t always comfortable opening up to her but when I did, she was always a source of strength. Moving away, living on my own, getting married all affect the parent-child relationship. There is so much to learn from her life and experiences. As an adult, I can now imagine the kind of challenges she faced in her twenties and in her married life. I liked how Simran eventually came to similar conclusions and how her relationship with Nandini evolved over the course of the book, particularly at the end.
Well-Behaved Indian Women portrayed beautifully how our histories make us and being a generation apart can make such a difference. So much happens in 20-30 years, we are almost different people. Touching on gender roles, Indian culture, marriage, love and familial relationships, this is an enjoyable read. A wedding is the time to bring families together and while travelling in India with my husband and being surrounded by my family – aunts and uncles – I felt immersed in the book and taken away by the festivities.
If you are interested to read Well-Behaved Indian Women, add it to your Goodreads shelf.
Many thanks to the publisher for providing me with a complimentary digital copy of the book for an honest review.
Ooh, I like the sound of this one, Kriti. Will have to track it down.